Harassholes Y’all

Someone brought me a copy of this photo from their office. 

It says:

Stop Harassholes Y’all

Not bad. 

Harassment plus as*holes = Harassholes. 

Thank G-d, there are some very good people and managers out there.

But unfortunately not everyone is, and so there are also some real stinkin’ abusers too. 

These types of people should never be in power, since they misuse it!

They do not use the power they have been entrusted with to advance progress, and do good for the organization and its people, but rather they clumsily wield power for their own selfish, personal pleasures and vendettas–bullying and harassing others–and simply because they can.

Belittling others, making them feel stupid and worthless, and then going after them for whatever they want. 

Through intimidation, they keep others from talking…shhh! hush!

Emotional, verbal, and even physical abuse can be common. 

I remember one colleague telling me how their boss would literally throw things at them in their office while they had to sit there “taking it.”

Another has a boss that makes them do the stupidest, most trivial tasks–completely worthless stuff–just to prove a point…that they’re in charge. 

Marginalization, threats, bullying, abuse, harassment…it goes on and it shouldn’t!

In some cases, the harassholes are even protected from someone above.

Money, power, honor…more, more, more!

But G-d sees these people too and eventually cuts the bad ones down to size. 

My father used to say:

G-d does not let any tree grow into the heavens!

Eventually, I am pretty sure that harassholes end up getting some very BIG hemorrhoids or something from above that teaches them to use G-d’s gifts for the good, and to properly love, care, and empathize for other human beings–G-d’s children!

I never knew why hemorrhoids existed in this world, but there is a purpose to everything under the heavens. 😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Sexual Harassment No, No, No

So I took this training about sexual harassment etc. 

There were some good general tips for managers confronting these challenging situations:

1) Address it quickly

2) Discuss it privately

3) Specify the problem behaviors

4) Get commitment that it won’t happen again

5) Document what occurred

It’s not rocket science, but thought this was useful guidance. 

Unfortunately, people don’t always behave appropriately, but hopefully, individuals and society as a whole can learn to do much better.  😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Crumbs Are For The Birds, Not The Workers

Since the days of slavery, workers have had very little in terms of rights or protections. 

The rich and powerful capitalist employers hold all the cards.

Like this poster says:

“Which Shall It Be?
Duke: ‘If you demand your rights, no more crumbs from my table.’
Working Man: ‘Give me my rights and keep your crumbs.'”

The capitalist owners enjoy being able to give “trickle-down economics” to the average working man. 

Basically, it’s just crumbs from the rich man’s table. 

And if you don’t like it, and you want rights, protections, and more…tough luck, and no more crumbs for you!

But the little guy who breaks his back to earn his daily bread, wants his dignity and respect more than the crumbs from the “capitalist pig” taking advantage of him.

Trickle-down is bullshit!

Crumbs aren’t going to raise the standard of living for the working class. 

We need living wages, social and income equality, and workers rights and protections to keep the little guy from being bulldozed by the rich and powerful. 

Certainly, there are many rich and powerful people that are good and generous, but not everyone is that that way. 

And we can’t have mistreatment of people by those wielding a whip over them.

Yes, workers need to perform and conduct themselves professionally–that is their job.

But workers shouldn’t be taken advantage of with poor wages, little to no benefits, and miserable working conditions (including bullying, harassment, and hostile work environments). 

Remember that in life tables can get turned and the rich and powerful can become the poor and the weak.  

Therefore, pay and treat your workers as you would want to be paid and treated. 

No one is so big as to be untouchable by G-d. 

Money and power will not save anyone from illness, accidents, disasters, and misfortune.

The only thing that does save people is good deeds, kind words, compassion, faith, and prayer. 

Crumbs are for the birds, dignity and respect are for the people!

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Sexual Acting Out

There is now a seemingly endless slate of sexual harassment allegations against some of the biggest shots from Hollywood to Washington, D.C. 

From the longest-serving Congressmen to the biggest star of morning television news, it seems that no one is sacrosanct.

Is it just that “absolute power corrupts absolutely”?

Or maybe it’s more broadly to be stated, as the Rabbi noted on Shabbat, that: 

“G-d created man perfectly imperfect!”

Men and women are created with sexual urges to procreate, bond emotionally and physically, and enjoy each other. 

Men tend to be the stronger than women and are able to have children into old age, and perhaps, it can be said, have the bigger “urge to merge.

Sure, there are women who are normally sexually active, and also those who are perhaps hypersexual (nympomaniac, “cougars,” etc.) and who commit sexual abuse too.

In fact, it was interesting that Wikipedia actually breaks rape down into 4 gender on gender categories:

– Rape of females by males

– Rape of females by females

– Rape of males by females

– Rape of males by males

Issues with physical intimacy and sexual harassment and violence span both sexes, however, it is also clear that:

“Rape affects women disproportionately, with the majority of people convicted being men.”

In the U.S., the statistics show gross levels of sexual violence to women:

– 1 in 5 women will be raped in their lifetime (vs 1 in 71 men).

– 91% of victims of rape and sexual assault are female.

Also, particularly disturbing is the number of girls and boys targeted:

– 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused before age 18. 

What type of society have we created, where women and children are not generally safe?

It’s interesting to me in Judaism that there is a recognition of sexual impulse, and that some Hasidim actually wear a “gartel” belt when praying to physically and spiritually separate the upper half of the body with the head and heart, from the lower half with the more animal instincts.

In short, the head and heart need to control the animal part of people. 

Unfortunately, this doesn’t seem to be happening in so many cases. 

Stunned from the outpouring of sexual allegations nearly everyday now, I said to my wife: 

“What is wrong with these people? They have it all: position, power, and wealth; and yet, they throw it all away –including their integrity and reputations–for a five minute lay in the hay!”

Is the animal instinct too strong for the person to control? That just isn’t going to cut it.

As a functioning society, it’s got be completely unacceptable for people to act out sexually or otherwise violently hurt their neighbors. 

It’s time for social reform and for the animals to be controlled by the people. 😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

The Long Arm Of The Law

This bird was hilarious running into and out of the ocean waves. 

Over and over again, it’s little puttering feet running toward and then just escaping the water rushing to the shore. 

In a way, I thought that I’d like to be as playful and happy as this little bird running and having fun in the water. 

But when I showed the video to my wife, she got a different message from it. 

She said, “you can’t outrun the long arm of the law!”

The (jail)bird runs towards trouble, but then running away, the waves of justice invariably catch up with it. 

I think with all the scandals in the news again lately from Hollywood to Washington D.C., we are all sort of stunned by the famous and hugely successful people who are now being caught up in inappropriate sex scandals and all sorts of abuse of women and men!

It’s wrong that these people use their wealth, fame, and power to hurt other people, period. 

There are no excuses, no lapses of judgement, especially when it seems to happen over and over again to the same people. 

Put your “package” back in your pants, and behave like upright human beings and not like a bunch of wild animals.

Yes, perhaps it’s one thing to be playful like the birds in the ocean waves, but it’s another to be part of the list of scumbags–if true as accused–like Anthony Weiner, Harvey Weinstein, Kevin Spacey, Louis C.K., Al Franken, John Conyers, and more. 

You can pay off the women with jobs and settlements, but you can’t escape the rushing water of ultimate judgement for your unbridled play and tarnished souls. 😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

You Can Always Go, Downtown!

This was fascinating to me at work this week…

I learned how people perceive who sits where and what it means to them.

They even come up with naming conventions for it.

So where (some) of the managers sit, that’s called “The White House.”

If you turn around and go towards the other end of the building, that’s called, “downtown.”

And crossing the hallway, past the elevators, that is called, “across the bridge,”

Clearly, the culture of each of these areas within the very same building can be completely different–some may be upbeat, friendly, and productive, and others not so much so or even the opposite with the folks running and screaming, “Get me outta here!”

The message…where people sit and even who sits next to whom is a big deal. 

Where you sit can indicate power, alliances, what is getting done, and at the other extreme who is on “the outs.”

Like in the movie, Office Space,  when the guy with the red stapler is moved with his desk and all into the caverns of the building–basically to rot because management didn’t quite like him. 

Often people who are in disfavor aren’t fired, they are simply put in cherem–excommunicated–and to die a slow and painful career and emotional death. 

On the other hand, those who are the shining stars of the organization get moved to a higher floor, with a better view, possibly a corner office, and near the boss–aha, you’re needed!

At work, I suggested a little enterprise architecture challenge to look at the three office areas: White House, Downtown, and Across the Bridge and to define the culture of these–what they are and also what do we want them to be for the people and how can we change to get there. 

No one should feel alienated, “less than” (as human beings), or put out to pasture (if they can be and want to be salvaged). 

The messages that are sent to people by assigning fancy titles, fatter paychecks, providing bigger and more luxuriously adorned offices is a form of performance management (reward and punishment)–but remember that those downtown or across the bridge–who may feel underutilized and not valued in the organization, may become the aggrieved marauding mobs that want to take the proverbial “kings head.”

While there are differences in where people are at in their careers and where they sit, generally-speaking advancement and mobility should always be based clearly on fairness, equal opportunity, and respect and dignity for all people regardless of race, color, religion, sex, etc. No one should be sitting in the leaky basement!

Also, sometimes it really is just “the luck of the draw” where people end up–truly–where G-d provides the right opportunity, you have the right skill set, those involved have the right personalities “to click”, and it’s at the right time “to work out.”.

What was also interesting about this to me is that one’s persons White House is another person’s downtown or across the bridge–it’s all relative and we are all part of the carnivorous food chain. 

Just to share something personal for me at work is that one thing that I do when setting up a meeting is that I never put in the meeting notice that the location is my office, but rather, I put it down as “my space,” because some people don’t have offices, but rather cubes, and I don’t want to make anyone feel bad. 

In the end, it’s all G-d’s space!  😉 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Under “The Thicker Skin”

Yesterday, I heard Pastor Robert Jeffress of a mega church in Dallas get on national television and tell Christians not to vote for a presidential candidate–Mitt Romney–because he’s a Mormon and went on to describe Mormonism as a cult.

What was so shocking was that there was no basis for the decision to vote or not to vote for someone based on political issues driving the discussion, it was purely one of religious intolerance.

I imagined how candidate Mitt Romney (and the Mormon establishment) must feel like to be subjected to a form of discrimination and stereotypical name calling just because of their religious faith.

Unfortunately, religious and other forms of bigotry and hatred are not new, but they are invective and undermining.

I personally remember a situation at a organization, where I was treated religiously unfairly.

There was a planned offsite meeting at the agency, and the meeting was going to run through lunch, so lunch was being ordered.

Being Jewish, I asked if a salad or tuna sandwich or anything Kosher or vegetarian could be made available so that I could participate. 

I was told by email that if I wanted anything special, I could bring it from home. 

Not a problem–I didn’t want to be a “Jewish problem”–I can certainly bring my own food and I did. 

However, when I got to the meeting and saw the lunch spread, the agency had ordered a special meal for someone else who was vegan–not a religious preference, just a dietary one.

Try imagining just for a second how it felt to be told that you could not be accommodated for anything kosher, but someone else would be “just because.” 

I brought this to the attention of the “powers that be,” but was told that I should go “develop a thicker skin.”

Well if the thicker skin means to become part of a group that practices intolerance and bigotry, it’s time to peel away that callous!

How people vote and how we treat our fellow man should not depend on their religion, where they come from, or the color of the skin.  

In a year, when the memorial for Martin Luther King, Jr. was unveiled on the National Mall, the dream for tolerance and freedom still has considerable room to blossom.

Hopefully, society wil continue to develop not a thicker skin, but a gentler kinder heart that embraces each, for what they can bring to the table. 

(Source Photo: here)