Expect Less / Appreciate More

I thought this was a great saying in the Wall Street Journal book review today.

“Expect Less, Appreciate More.”

Many people in their late 30s and early 40s become disillusioned with life. 

They have been on the treadmill chasing love, fame, and fortune for so long. 

But reality sets in and they don’t get everything they think they have coming to them.

Hence some level of mid-life crisis sets in. 

However by the time people reach their 50s, things seem to shift again, and a happiness or peacefulness sets in. 

People start to expect less and instead appreciate more from the blessings they do have. 

The treadmill becomes a long walk along the beautiful beach or park trail. 

We don’t need to chase success, but rather just see the great lives in so many ways that G-d has already bestowed on us. 

The U-shaped curve of life–where we start all bright-eyes and bushy tailed in our younger years and which descends into disappointment and disillusionment in mid-life, comes up once again to happiness and a fulfillment in our later years. 

Over the course of our lives, we learn that life does not ask, but rather it tells us. 

And if we just listen, we can find meaning and contentment amidst it all. 😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Wanting It Too Much

It’s funny how we all dream about something…

Money, honor, success, large families, health, beauty, popularity, big houses, fancy cars, exciting vacations, and so on. 

Some people even dream of technology and big data, and wanting to either come up with “the next big thing” or simply have all the answers to everything. 

In the election session now, Saturday Night Live (SNL) frequently makes fun of some candidates at how much they desperately want to be president. 

I wonder though between the connection of wanting something so much and actually getting it. 

Does wanting it…led you to actually get it. 

OR

Perhaps, it actually can push it further away. 

One women who I was talking with told me that the more you want something, the less likely you are to get it, period.

You want it too much (you’re greedy, narcissistic, or think you are somehow ultimately deserving and the world just owes it to you)!

The universe just won’t let you have it when you are desperate for it. 

You have to be ready for it…cool with it…and most importantly, at peace with yourself, and then you can get where you want to be. 

There is something that rings so true about that. 

Desperation and success do not make good bedfellows. 

In fact, the more you know somebody wants something, isn’t that just such a huge turn-off (you start questioning their motives and everything) and in a way you want to recoil and not give it to them. 

Sure, knowing what you want helps. 

Hard work helps. 

But being okay with whatever G-d decides for you is critical. 

You can’t go with your head through the door!

G-d will either open or close the path to you…and all the kings horses and all the kings men won’t make the difference in the end. 😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Can You Have Too Much Money?

I took this photo inside a 16 Handles that sells frozen yogurt and toppings. 

The cashier had put out this cup for tips.

On the cup is a sign that says:

“Money is the root of all evil.  Cleanse yourself here.  Thanks.”

Sort of a smart way to get people to give. 

Afterwards, I was mulling over whether it’s true–is money “the bad guy” in life or what makes us do bad things?

Sure, people want money–and they usually like lots of it–they want to live “the good life” –with big houses, fancy cars, nice clothes, good food, exotic vacations, and financial security–how sweet it is!

And so often when people can’t get it legitimately, they will resort to lying, cheating, and stealing to get it.

But fortune is just a facet of something larger that gnaws at people souls –and that is greed. 

People don’t just want money, they are also greedy for power, fame, brains, brawn, sexual satisfaction, and a long (or immortal) life to enjoy it all. 

So probably greed is the real root of all evil and money is just one of the larger branches.

Perhaps that is why religion and piety is often associated with asceticism–avoiding indulgence–and instead devoting oneself more to spiritual pursuits in life and to servitude of G-d. 

Also of course, devotion to family, friends, and community–doing good deeds–giving and not taking–are held in high esteem for people looking for something more meaningful and devout in life.

Also, having recently seem some people with “too much of a good thing”–I realized that when people actually get all the material things they want and in such complete abundance–they can literally drown themselves in it.  

It’s sickening after a while–literally–the law of diminishing returns kicks in, and the things that are so coveted just become overwhelming and poisonous to the person. 

I saw this in a movie once too where the person who stole from the king is punished by having swathes and swathes of molten gold poured down the person’s throat–“You want it that bad, well here it is!”

There comes a point, a maturity, a depth, a realization, when a person just wishes for enough in life, for the people they love, and for happiness with them–they find genuine contentment–and that is something worth being greedy for. 😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Who’s Getting The Attention Now?

I took this photo of this couple online in Starbucks this morning. 

It was very hard not to notice this guy’s sneakers and socks (on the left). 

Hot pink sneakers with matching Homer Simpson pink socks. 

I thought to myself that you’ve got to be pretty bold to go out and wear that. 

It’s funny how people love attention, and often it seems like they will say, wear, and act any which way they have to in order to get it. 

Maybe (good) attention is like currency:

– It’s valuable when your noticed (you become instantaneously cool, one to follow, maybe gets into the school or job you always wanted, oh and don’t forget all the likes on Facebook or the paparazzi).

– It feels good to have some (who wants to be ignored or looked down on? Positive attention is like an addictive drug to many people).

– You can trade attention with others (they give you some and you give them some–it’s like rubbing each others backs, but in this case it’s your egos instead). 

– Perhaps, you can even save some up in the (memory) bank (where people remember what a great gal or guy you are). 

Think about what do you do to get attention and is it something you are proud of or are you acting a little mischievous, naughty, and outlandish to get it? 

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

The Kardashian Ball-Busters

So despite the immense beauty, fame, and fortune associated with the Kardashian women…if you are a man, you may want to stay far far far away. 

It seems like in the end, nothing good ever turns out for the Kardashian men–who BTW are often ballplayers and even Olympic athletes. 

Kris’s husbands:

– Robert Kardashian (1st husband) – divorced in 1991 after Kris’s affair and lavish lifestyle spending, remained close friends, and died of esophageal cancer in 2003.

– Bruce Jenner (2nd husband) – divorced in 2014, and revealed “excruciatingly painful” transgender crisis and transformation to Caitlyn Jenner. 

Kim’s husbands: 

– Damon Thomas (1st husband) – Messy divorce in 2004.

– Chris Humphries (2nd husband) – Filed for divorce after 1 year, 7 months and divorce completed in 2013.

– Kanye West (3rd husband) – Marriage issues and divorce rumors abound from frustration over Kim’s weight gain to the two sleeping apart. 

Chloe’s husband:

Lamar Odom (1st husband) – Signed divorce paper in 2015, and now in coma after drug overdose in brothel. 

Kourtney’s partner: 

– Scott Disick (Ex partner) – Broke up in 2015 and continues struggling with drugs and alcohol addiction.

What about brother, Rob Kardashian?

– He too is struggling with a weight problem and depression, and is estranged from his family. 

Anyway, it all starts with Kris Jenner, the controlling family matriarch who has been said to be “testy, demanding, manipulative,” and generally narcissistic.  

And how about the Kardashian daughters–who are they as people?–as they air their freewheeling “have it all” lifestyles on the show, Keeping Up With The Kardashians?

Even though they call it a reality show, maybe the real reality–like for most of humankind–is not so “all that” and glamorous after all? 😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Total CIO Ping Pong

Excuse the quality of this video, which my wife took while challenging me to a game of ping pong.

So what’s the point?

It’s important to work hard, but also to enjoy life and have some good times as well.

There is a Talmudic saying that he who goes through life without enjoying the world will be held accountable by G-d.

Aside from Judaism being against strict asceticism, this saying always sort of bewildered me, like why would religion need to tell you to enjoy yourself?

I think the answer is that in our zeal to advance ourselves–whatever that means for each person (accumulating wealth, offspring, expertise, fame, wisdom, spiritual growth)–we can go overboard, become obsessive-compulsive, and forget to refresh, rejuvenate and just relax and enjoy the life too.

You don’t have to deny yourself; but also, you don’t have to go crazy and be a pig either–just be balanced.

Play some ping pong or whatever, let loose a little, and be yourself. 🙂

This Fish Doesn’t Bite

It’s annual Shark Week–apparently, there is now a dedicated week for just about everything.

Although I am not sure how that works with only 52 weeks a year…unless every week is “dedicated” to multiple honors, rememberances, etc.

Like they say, everyone/everything gets their five minutes of fame.

This picture is of the Discovery Building in downtown Silver Spring.

Yeah, there is a ginormous shark head hanging off the side of the building (and you can see a little bit of the fins and tail hanging off the sides).

This guy, turned around and staring at the shark head, practically missed his ride, but then again this is not something you see everyday on the way to work.

Jaws meet DC commuters/workforce–we’re not running from this gefilte fish. 😉

A Little Nostalgia For NYC

A little nostalgia for the talent and creativity of New York.Sing loud.

Dance in the streets.

Show what you can do.

Do it!

Yearn to be your best.

Don’t let anyone else spoil your dreams.

Live forever.

Thanks Fame–Thanks Irene Cara.

>It’s About Meaning, Not Money

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A colleague shared this with me and now I carry it wherever I go:

“In the quiet hours when we are alone and there is nobody to tell us what fine fellow we are, we come sometimes upon a moment in which we wonder, not how much money we are earning, nor how famous we have become, but what good are we doing.” -A.A. Milne