Sexual Acting Out

There is now a seemingly endless slate of sexual harassment allegations against some of the biggest shots from Hollywood to Washington, D.C. 


From the longest-serving Congressmen to the biggest star of morning television news, it seems that no one is sacrosanct.


Is it just that “absolute power corrupts absolutely”?


Or maybe it’s more broadly to be stated, as the Rabbi noted on Shabbat, that: 

“G-d created man perfectly imperfect!”

Men and women are created with sexual urges to procreate, bond emotionally and physically, and enjoy each other. 


Men tend to be the stronger than women and are able to have children into old age, and perhaps, it can be said, have the bigger “urge to merge.


Sure, there are women who are normally sexually active, and also those who are perhaps hypersexual (nympomaniac, “cougars,” etc.) and who commit sexual abuse too.


In fact, it was interesting that Wikipedia actually breaks rape down into 4 gender on gender categories:


– Rape of females by males

– Rape of females by females

– Rape of males by females

– Rape of males by males


Issues with physical intimacy and sexual harassment and violence span both sexes, however, it is also clear that:

“Rape affects women disproportionately, with the majority of people convicted being men.”


In the U.S., the statistics show gross levels of sexual violence to women:


– 1 in 5 women will be raped in their lifetime (vs 1 in 71 men).


– 91% of victims of rape and sexual assault are female.


Also, particularly disturbing is the number of girls and boys targeted:


– 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused before age 18. 


What type of society have we created, where women and children are not generally safe?


It’s interesting to me in Judaism that there is a recognition of sexual impulse, and that some Hasidim actually wear a “gartel” belt when praying to physically and spiritually separate the upper half of the body with the head and heart, from the lower half with the more animal instincts.


In short, the head and heart need to control the animal part of people. 


Unfortunately, this doesn’t seem to be happening in so many cases. 


Stunned from the outpouring of sexual allegations nearly everyday now, I said to my wife: 

“What is wrong with these people? They have it all: position, power, and wealth; and yet, they throw it all away –including their integrity and reputations–for a five minute lay in the hay!”


Is the animal instinct too strong for the person to control? That just isn’t going to cut it.


As a functioning society, it’s got be completely unacceptable for people to act out sexually or otherwise violently hurt their neighbors. 


It’s time for social reform and for the animals to be controlled by the people. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

The Long Arm Of The Law

This bird was hilarious running into and out of the ocean waves. 


Over and over again, it’s little puttering feet running toward and then just escaping the water rushing to the shore. 


In a way, I thought that I’d like to be as playful and happy as this little bird running and having fun in the water. 


But when I showed the video to my wife, she got a different message from it. 


She said, “you can’t outrun the long arm of the law!”


The (jail)bird runs towards trouble, but then running away, the waves of justice invariably catch up with it. 


I think with all the scandals in the news again lately from Hollywood to Washington D.C., we are all sort of stunned by the famous and hugely successful people who are now being caught up in inappropriate sex scandals and all sorts of abuse of women and men!


It’s wrong that these people use their wealth, fame, and power to hurt other people, period. 


There are no excuses, no lapses of judgement, especially when it seems to happen over and over again to the same people. 


Put your “package” back in your pants, and behave like upright human beings and not like a bunch of wild animals.


Yes, perhaps it’s one thing to be playful like the birds in the ocean waves, but it’s another to be part of the list of scumbags–if true as accused–like Anthony Weiner, Harvey Weinstein, Kevin Spacey, Louis C.K., Al Franken, John Conyers, and more. 


You can pay off the women with jobs and settlements, but you can’t escape the rushing water of ultimate judgement for your unbridled play and tarnished souls. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

What Women Want From Men

What Women Want.jpeg

So I was talking to this nice gentleman.


He was telling me that he lost his wife of over 27 years to cancer–this happened over 15 years ago. 


And since then, he had a girlfriend who recently broke his heart and married someone else. 


I felt really bad and sorry for this nice man–who is always so friendly and intelligent.  


He says to me:

“Over the years, I’ve learned what women want from men.”


I ask him inquiringly:

“And what is that?”


He’s obviously glad that I asked, and he proceeds to tell me:

“Women want two things: curiosity and security.”


Not understanding what he means by the first one, I ask:

“What do you mean curiosity?”


He looks intently at me and says:

“Women want to talk, and they want to know what’s going on.”


He explains to me that if you talk and be a good listener to women and provide (your part) materially in a stable relationship with them–they will be happy and you will be happy. 


This is sort of the “Happy wife, happy life” idea that I’ve heard before. 


Listen, even at this stage in my life, with a wife and two lovely daughters, I can still learn something about what makes women happy…teach me the pearls of wisdom and I will learn it well. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

These Pants Are In Vogue

Vogue Pants.jpeg

I just thought these women’s pants were so cool (yet gaudy).


Another standout you think. 


A fashion magazine making up fashionable ladies pants. 


The covers are bright, colorful, and feature a array of many women and looks up and down each pant’s leg. 


The pants are a collage of these all.


These pants are probably not for the faint of heart–you’ve got to have courage to wear these. 


Some might say, you’d be crazy…


A ladies next dilemma–what shoes do you wear with these?  😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

People Nutrition

Nutrition.jpeg

This is an risque t-shirt this lady is wearing.


It’s a big nutrition label. 


And she’s wrapped in it!


I’m not sure if this is a gag or fashion statement or even a sexual thing.


Is she advertising that she’s like the food?


What was really funny though is by her butt…it says 


“Moschino chocolate tastes good.”


Maybe that should be a black box warning!


Uh, this is way too much information for me. 😉


(Source Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)

I Love A Strong Woman, But…

Sickle Knife.jpeg

Ok, admit it or not.


This is certainly something that every man fears: ~Castration Phobia~


Of course, I don’t know what she’s planning, but with that huge sickle-shaped knife and that big disarming smile, I definitely don’t want to find out. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal) 

Tarzan Confronts Jane

tarzan-jpeg

Thought this was pretty funny.


I went to the gym to do some lifting. 


And low and behold, someone had left this funny message:


“Dear Tarzan,
Please put the heavy weights back so I can move the bar up and down.”
Thank you,
Jane”


How creative a message was that!


Tarzan and Jane, nice sense of humor. 


Effectively asks for what she wants–put away the weights when you’re done!


Is polite about it–please and thank you.


Must’ve worked because the bar was unencumbered and moving up and down fine, and there was no leftover heavy weights to be found. 


A little thoughtful note can go a long way. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Truly My Love

Graffiti

So this is the graffiti on the wall of the ladies bathroom in Barnes and Noble. 


My wife said to make sure everyone knows that she took the photo and not me (uh, that would be awkward). 


I can’t make out all the graffiti on the wall, but the one in the center says:


“True love isn’t something made up in stories or books. It exists truly, if you believe truly, and truly fight for it. Real love is magic.”


Another one talks about “Gonzales” who is the most beautiful man.


And yet one more…


“I wish I knew how to tell my boyfriend I love him.”


Let me just be frank that the Graffiti in men’s bathrooms is nothing, nothing like this. 


It’s more obscene, uses lots of 4 letter words, and has women’s first names and phone numbers. 


Why do women write and profess their love for men on bathroom walls, while men seem to think and express themselves in far more graphic terms–and why do this while in the stinkin’ bathroom?


I think this may make for some interesting gender studies for someone out there. 


From a technology perspective, I think if people are going to insist on thinking and fantasizing in the public bathroom, perhaps we need some white boards or monitors that you can write and erase from–that way at least we can make room for the next guy/gal to write their truly’s next. 😉


(Source Photo: Dannielle Blumenthal)

Size And Smell

Sex
So apparently data mining can be used for all sorts of research…



In the New York Times today, Seth Stephens-Davidowitz tries his hand with google search results to better understand people’s feelings about sex. 



Though Stephens-Davidowitz doesn’t explain how he gets these google statistics…here are some standouts:



As you might have guessed, the biggest complaint from men–and women–is that they don’t get/have enough sex. 



For both (as you might imagine in a primarily–95%–heterosexual world), traditional surveys show that it’s about once a week.



However, the author says this is exaggerated (yeah, is it surprising that people exaggerate about this?) and it’s actually only about 30 times a year–or once every 12 days.



So there are a lot of search on “sexless” or “won’t have sex with me.”



Observing that “sex can be quite fun,” he questions, “why do we have so little of it?”



And he concludes that it’s because we have “enormous anxiety” and insecurity about our bodies and sexuality.



Again, you probably wouldn’t need data mining to guess the results, but men’s biggest worry is about their penis size, and one of women’s most toxic worries–a “strikingly common concern”–is about the smell of their vagina.



For men, they actually google questions about genital size more often than they have questions about any other body part; in fact, more than “about their lungs, liver, feet, ears, nose, throat, and brain combined.”



So much for health consciousness versus machismo pride. 



The funny thing is apparently women don’t seem to care so much about this with only about 1 search on this topic for every 170 searches that men do on this. 



Surprising to most men, about 40% of the searches women do conduct on this topic is “complaints” that it is too big!



Not that size doesn’t matter to women, but for them it’s about the size of their breasts and butts–and again, bigger being generally considered better.



In this case, most men seem to agree. 



Another issue men are concerned about is premature ejaculation and how to make the experience last longer.



However, here women seem to be looking for information about half and half on how to make men climax more quickly on one hand, and more slowly on the other. 



Overall, men are from Mars and women from Venus, with lot’s of misunderstanding between the sexes.



The conclusion from this big data study…everyone calm down and just try to enjoy each other more.



Amazing the insights we can get from data mining! 😉



(Source Photo: here with attribution to Daniel)

100 Times Harassed


After my last blog on stopping sexual assault, a colleague brought this other video to my attention.



32 million views and 120 thousand comments and counting. 


This young lady walks around the streets of New York for 10 hours in jeans and a t-shirt and is verbally harassed a 100 times–not including winks and whistles. 



Women (and men) should not have to live in fear, shame, or be abused doing nothing but living their lives peacefully and respectfully. 



Darn, can the folks out there show some respect and decency.



This could be your mother, wife, sister, or daughter…think about it.



Video sponsored by IHollaback