Bad Boyz

Sword.jpeg

Bad boyz, bad boyz what you gonna do?


When the bad boyz come to hurt the girls.


The bad boyz better watch out. 


Feminism is alive and well. 


Women are individuals full of rights and fights. 


No one will take away what is theirs by G-d given creation of their soul and body. 


Whoever tries to is destined to the dustbins of history. 


Bad boyz, bad boyz…better recognize that women are people too.


And they are smart, resourceful, powerful, and good. 


Sugar and spice and everything naughty and nice. 


911, 911, 911…take this bad boyz away.  😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Advertisements

There’s No Shield Against Loneliness

Lonelieness.jpeg

Loneliness is empty, hollow, a panicky void, and depression. 


It’s like being in the ocean and feeling so small in its massive depths…almost like drowning. 


In the end, you are alone in the universe. 


No one can truly feel your pain or joy or experience all of you.


You’re a world unto yourself. 


You connect and form relationships with others–there is learning and growth and love and caring in that. 


Talking and reaching out and being part of someone and something washes away parts of those scary feelings and creates a greater purpose of being and meaning. 


But there is also silence and solitude and the darkness of the night. 


And in that there is just the faith in G-d Almighty. 


He alone is what comforts us as we stare into the vastness out there as well as the evil and loss that we come face-to-face with and combat in life. 


The soldier girds his sword for battle and carries a shield to protect himself.


But there is no shield for the loneliness we experience in life and ultimately in death itself. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

A Person’s Beauty

Hair.JPEG

I took this photo yesterday of a mannequin that shows off her hair. 


It’s amazing what hair does for a person.


I remember learning in Yeshiva that hair is considered the crown on a person’s head. 


People go through all sorts of time and expense to keep their hair, grow it out, clean it, and style it.


Often not having hair means that person is sick and on heavy doses of medication or chemotherapy that makes their hair fall out. 


People put on wigs or other head coverings for religious piety, modesty, and to consecrate themselves to G-d and/or their beloved–so that only they should see it–as something special between them. 


Sometimes, a person’s hair is cut off to dehumanize them like the Nazi’s did to the Jews and as happens to other prisoners. 


Also, when people go to the military, they are given a crew cut to take away their hair and individuality while they learn to conform and be obedient to their chain of command. 


Often in fights, people grab and pull a person by their hair to control and hurt them. 


But mostly, hair is soft, sensual and looks good on a person (except when it doesn’t)–generally, it evokes youth, vibrance, freedom, and sexuality. 


Of course beauty is only skin deep, but the hair is truly the majestic crown that G-d gave us. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Cool Cat

Cat
So yesterday I was coming home from the fitness center/pool.



I was wearing shorts and pool shoes even though it was only in the 30’s-40’s temperature out. 



This large man with a Texas accent stops me to ask how I can dress like that around Winter time.



And it’s particularly funny, because there is another man overhearing this conversation next to us wrapped up in no less than 2 coats/layers.



So I say in a lighthearted way “I guess that I just have warm blood, so the temperature doesn’t really bother me.”



He says, “Uh, in Florida, when it goes into the 60’s, people start shivering and bundling up down there.”



I smile, and say “Well maybe we’re just different people.”



Then he goes, “I like that–I like people that think different! You know why, [and he pauses and repeats again] you know why?”



I look at him sort of eyes wide open at this point waiting to hear his explanation to the build up. 



And he says, “Because it means they don’t give a sh*t what other people think!”



At that point we both started nodding and laughing. 



Maybe you had to be there, but I think you can probably envision this sort of nutty scene.  😉



(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Decision-Making With Perspective, Please.

Decision-Making With Perspective, Please.

An article in Fast Company (1 April 2013) by Chip and Dan Heath tells us to use the 10/10/10 rule for making tough decisions.

That is to consider how you will feel about the decision in 10 minutes, in 10 months, and in 10 years–in order to “get some distance on our decisions.”

But this doesn’t make a lot of sense to me, if you are making a decision, looking at it with 3 future lenses does not provide a lot of additional insight even if they are at various points in the future.

What makes a lot more sense is to examine the decision based on past, present, and future consideration.

Past–At home, I learned from my father that when he makes a big decision, he thinks about what his father would’ve have done in a similar situation. My dad greatly respected his father, and believes that he is a guiding force in his everyday life. It is important to consider what our parents, grandparents, and other people that we respect from our past would do in similar circumstances–this is a social view. For example, would your parents and grandparents be proud of your decision and what it represents for you as a person or would you feel ashamed and guilty, if they found out. This is not to say that you can’t express your individuality, but rather that your past is one important guidepost to consider.

Present–In operational law enforcement and defense environment, I learned that you have to respect the decision-maker at the frontline. The details of what is happening or the ground in the here and now can certainly be a decisive factor in both split second decisions, but also those decisions where we have some luxury of contemplation–this is an operational view. Additionally, in making a big decision, we need to be true to ourselves and base the decision on our values and beliefs (i.e. who we are). In contrast, when we make decisions that violate our core beliefs, we usually regret it pretty quickly.

Future–In Yeshiva, I learned to strongly consider the future in all decision-making. The notion that this world is just a corridor to the future world was a frequent theme. From this religious perspective, what is important in how we live our lives today is not the immediate pleasure we can get, but rather what the future consequences will be on our spirit/soul (i.e. Neshama)–this is a strategic view. One teacher exhorted us to always look at things from the future perspective of our death bed–will you feel you lived your life as a good person and in a fulfilling way or did you just do what felt good or was selfish and fleeting? For example, he said, “No one ever looked back and wish they spent more time working. Instead, they usually regret not spending more time with the family and true friends.”

Decision-making is not trivial–you need to consider carefully what you do, with whom, when and how. To do this, looking at 3 points in the future is minimally helpful. Instead, consider your past, present, and future, and you will make better decisions that will enable you to be true to yourself, your family and community, and your very soul.

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)