Best Chicken Lo Mein (Kosher)

Best Chicken Lo Mein (Kosher too!) that I ever had. 


At China Bistro and Sushi in Hollywood, Florida.


Order the extra chicken for a couple of bucks.


Well worth it!

 

Steaming hot from the wok. 


And don’t forget to make it extra spicy!  😉


(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Kosher Cheeseburger, Finally

So I’ve never had a cheeseburger. 


I keep kosher. 


And we don’t mix milk and meat together.


Tough watching all the fast food commercials from McDonalds, Burger King, Wendy’s, and more. 


So lo’ and behold, my surprise when they introduced the kosher cheeseburger.


It uses the Impossible Burger made from plants–and it’s advertised as having more protein, less fat, no cholesterol, and fewer calories than meat. 


So we got two bags of food from Goldberg’s bagels. 


One bag had breakfast with bagels and egg salad. 


The other bag had the kosher cheeseburgers for lunch (after the morning’s activity)


We ate the egg salad bagels and they were good. 


But we were really looking forward to the cheeseburgers. 


Finally, after all these years of waiting…


But what happens, Dossy threw out the garbage from breakfast and…


She accidentally threw out the Impossible Burgers with it. 


So when we got back to the car, salivating for the cheeseburgers…


We look in the front, in the back, in the compartments–and nothing!


It’s gone!  It’s all gone!


No freakin cheeseburger for me. 


Not then, not now, and I’m afraid not ever.  😦


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Take Your Head Out of My Shopping Cart

So this was funny today at Harris Teeter. 


I’m checking out on the express line with a few things. 


First some tofu.


The lady at the cash register goes:

Hmm.  Healthy!


Then some Meal Mart Buffalo Style Chicken Wings.


Again, the lady at the cash register comments:

Have you tried that?  Is it good?  It looks good!


Politely, I replied:

Yes, they are really good.


At the same time I was feeing smart-alecy, like what the heck, should I open the package on the conveyer belt and let you taste one–right here, right now.   


Sure privacy is a big issue when it comes to technology, social media, and all sorts of surveillance these days


But even when one simply goes to the grocery store–there is the very basic privacy about what one is buying. 


Yes, I see people looking into my cart, with eyebrows raised eyeing my goodies.  I can hear them thinking:

What is he buying?  Is it marked Kosher? (Uh, actually it is!]  That doesn’t seem like a balanced diet!


Another time, the checkout person asked me when I was buying a bunch of something:

Oh, are you having a party? What’s the occasion?


While I appreciate the good-natured banter and people being friendly, it seems more than weird in a way to be discussing what I’m buying, why, and for whom.  


Not quite Big Brother, but maybe that’s the leftover small town feel in our lonely urban and high-tech living.  😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Green Eggs and Ham – דוקטור סוס

So who would’ve thought that Dr. Seuss’s “Green Eggs and Ham” comes in Hebrew. 


I watched this video, and loved it!


It is amazing that this can translate over.


One critique that I have is that the book should’ve said that the main character didn’t want to eat the green eggs and ham, because he is kosher (instead of not being hungry or not loving the food).  


But then again, he would’ve had to stick to his guns and not have eaten it in the end.


One other thing that I learned from this video/book, is that even though I am loving learning Hebrew in Ulpan class, I still have the vocabulary of a 9 year old.  LOL


But I’m learning… 😉


(Thank you to my daughter, Rebecca for sharing this with me.)

Who Is More Religious?

Please see my new article in The Times of Israel called, “Being Super Duper Kosher.”

Of course, I am sure many good people are trying to do the right thing and genuinely practice to be better servants of Hashem. However, this should never become an excuse to use religious practices to misguidedly “compete”–hurt or shame–and somehow “one up” their neighbor’s religiosity or status as fellow Jews. That would be to erroneously think that G-d can’t see all His children as good and deserving in their own ways, even though the creator can certainly see what is in the heart and in the doings of all of us.


Hope this resonates with many of you who are kosher but feel unfairly (mis)judged by all the latest variations these days. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Worst Passover Cake Ever

So this has got to be the worst Passover cake ever. 


It’s definitely not kosher for Pesach. 


Not only is it made from chametz, but it’s shaped like a chazer (i.e. pig) too.


This thing would be conceptually treyf even on the best of non-Passover days. 


Does it have lard too? 


I don’t know for sure, but would it really be a pig cake if it didn’t!

This lousy cake doesn’t even have an ounce of chocolate in it–have you ever heard of a genuine dessert that tastes like the calorie count it adds up to be without chocolate? 


I’ve heard of the callous calling people a pig for eating too much cake and being fat, but making the oink oink face directly on the cake itself–and on Passover–is not only insulting, but at $28.95, it’s overpriced too. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Fortune Cookie Generator

Ok, this is a most interesting fortune cookie:

“If your cookie still in one piece, buy lotto.”


Hmm, what cookie is this referring to?  And why should I buy lotto?


So I start to think that this is likely a computer-generated garbage fortune–i.e. the artificial intelligence makes no f*ckin sense! 


Anyway, you will be fascinated to know that the modern fortune cookie with the paper fortune inside the hollow of the cookie was invented in California.


However, the Japanese put something like this in the bend of the cookie already in the 19th century. 


Using this fortune as an example, I have this gnawing feeling that the Japanese fortunes had a lot more intellectual substance to them. 


Anyway, someone tell this lame cookie fortune teller that Lotto is way out and Powerball is in and where the real winnings are. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)