From Mouth To Friendship

So it’s amazing how people are so willing to throw away friendship. 


They get angry about something having nothing even to do with you.


They say things they probably don’t even mean, and in turn you may say things you don’t even mean. 


Often you say things just to bring the other person to their senses. 


But sometimes they don’t come to their senses. 


They need to let out on someone and you’re the convenient scapegoat. 


Before you know it, they throw your friendship under a bus. 


Personally, I’m not one to make friends that easily or quickly–there needs to be some real chemistry and the building of trust–but then I am one who is an eternally loyal friend. 


Yet, I see others, they kiss and hug and say you’re like family, but then when they get angry, oh boy, you are gone like the wind. 


Maybe that’s not what real friendship is. 


To me, friendship surpasses dumb deeds and words and stupid fights, it’s about being there through thick and thin.


Take the false teeth out and put some permanent ones in–they last much longer. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

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What Women Want From Men

What Women Want.jpeg

So I was talking to this nice gentleman.


He was telling me that he lost his wife of over 27 years to cancer–this happened over 15 years ago. 


And since then, he had a girlfriend who recently broke his heart and married someone else. 


I felt really bad and sorry for this nice man–who is always so friendly and intelligent.  


He says to me:

“Over the years, I’ve learned what women want from men.”


I ask him inquiringly:

“And what is that?”


He’s obviously glad that I asked, and he proceeds to tell me:

“Women want two things: curiosity and security.”


Not understanding what he means by the first one, I ask:

“What do you mean curiosity?”


He looks intently at me and says:

“Women want to talk, and they want to know what’s going on.”


He explains to me that if you talk and be a good listener to women and provide (your part) materially in a stable relationship with them–they will be happy and you will be happy. 


This is sort of the “Happy wife, happy life” idea that I’ve heard before. 


Listen, even at this stage in my life, with a wife and two lovely daughters, I can still learn something about what makes women happy…teach me the pearls of wisdom and I will learn it well. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Turning To Love

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Just an observation about love today.


But it seems that it’s far easier and more frequent to see love turn to hate and resentment than vice versa.


It’s a lot easier to destroy a relationship (or any success) than to build it to begin with.


Even as we talk about forgiveness and loving thy neighbor, it seems that more often than not negative feelings are at best turned to acceptance or neutral feelings rather than back to true endearment.


This state is often accompanied by such fears or protectionist sayings as “leopards don’t change their spots” or “love once lost is lost forever.”


While we may be willing to turn the other cheek for a moment or even a while, bad feelings and distrust towards another does not make the leap back to closeness and an endearing, loving relationship all that often.


Of course, there are exceptions where through trust building measures and “easing of sanctions” or hostilities, we can over time rebuild a relationship and become allies or partners again.


However, it is far easier to break trust and lose love then to ever rebuild and recover it.


All the more reason to cherish our meaningful relationships and make love count, sing, and dance for us every moment of every day. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

The Beating Of Life’s Drums

So this was some awesome drumming at the Renaissance Festival today.


The beating of the drums was powerful and in a sense mesmerizing. 


It moved the people to sway, to dance, and to feel the power of the moment. 


In life, as they say, we all sort of move to a different beat–our own beat!


Recently, I had the experience to meet someone who was a truly wonderful person, but who came from a very different geographical, religious, and cultural background. 


There just seemed to be so many misunderstandings as a result, and it wasn’t because anyone was being hurtful or a bad person. 


Rather, we were dealing with good people, who just had very different expectations of each other and of life. 


The beat was there–like a heartbeat, but the beat wasn’t in sync, so in the end, everyone decided it best to go their own way in blessing, and find the life that would met their needs and where the beat was going to be in tune for them. 


In a sense, while we are all the same, yet we are all subtly different whether by nature and/or nurture, we come to situations and to each other with different viewpoints, distinct needs, as well as specific ways to satisfy them and grow us. 


Good and bad is beyond the point.  


Two hearts beat as one and that is a miracle when it happens. 


At other times, two hearts beat each other in their differences and maybe in exasperation and finally in sorrow.


The beats are strong and we search for the beats that uplift us, mesh with us, and make us better when we’re together. 😉


(Source Video: Andy Blumenthal)

Coupling, The Beauty Of

Couple

So just a couple of birds, right?


Not to me!


There were a number of reminders to me today about how special and fortunate it is for any of us to be with someone we love.


It’s not just that two heads are better than one. 


Pretty much, everything is better with a partner who looks back at us and smiles. 


We magnify the joy and we share the sorrow, together.


What my dad used to call my mom, his “better half!”


What we are lacking in, often our soulmate can fill in the blank. 


And planning and executing is as a team, rather than flying solo. 


There is someone who keeps our lofty ideas in check and at the same time challenges us when it’s time to think bigger. 


We learn from the other person, at the same time that we teach them maybe a little thing or two from our repertoire. 


Strategically, divide and conquer makes everything from routine tasks to complex projects easier to achieve, especially when we agree on the goal and the approach. 


Even the “occasional” disagreements and fights helps us to learn to control our temperament and to work things out or when to take a break and think things through afresh. 


Someone to reach out to.


Someone to hold unto. 


Someone to caress.


Someone to buttress. 

 

Someone who makes us a better person than the one we see in the mirror naked and mortal. 


Like 2 by 2 in Noah’s Ark or in the birds and the bees, we are committed to that special someone. 


The Bat Kol calls out “so and so shall be married to so and so” like only the L-rd in heaven can decree from the rib of man to the flesh of a women. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Eye To Eye

Eye to Eye
I took this photo from a sticker plastered on the street corner in Washington, D.C. 



What I like about it, aside from it’s cute, is that I see a message here about good communications and conflict management skills. 



Notice the eyes are different (one is green/yellow and the other is orange/blue)…like it’s two people. 



But there is one mouth open, speaking between them.



This speaks to that while we may be talking to each other and even think we are saying the same thing (“violently in agreement”), we need to make sure that we are listening, understanding, and working through our differences–so at the end, we are both really “seeing eye to eye.” 



While each of us is different, and we may never fully agree (and cabn “agree to disagree”), we can also negotiate and come to terms on a win-win course of action. 



Talk it out, bridge the gaps, and get to a place where we not only are able to see eye to eye, but can then go forward together and make it truly work. 😉



(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)