Time To Mellow

Decided I needed a break from all the toxicity related to the 3rd major SAR Child Sex Abuse Scandal at this yeshiva,


This beautiful Japanese garden is way better to look at then the lies, denials, and cover-up that SAR and their public relations cronies are posting. 


Anyway, tired of their bullsh*t and you should be too. 


Enjoy the beautiful Japanese Garden. 


Compliments of one of the prior child victims of SAR Academy. 


(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

SAR — Safe Haven For Sexual Abusers, Not For Kids

SAR ACADEMY: SAFE HAVEN FOR SEXUAL ABUSERS


SAR has had at least 5 alleged and/or convicted sexual abusers on their rolls or associated with them that we know about:


1. Stanley Rosenfeld (1970s-1980s)

2. Rabbi Sheldon Schwartz (1970s-2018)

3. Jane Doe, female staff member in High School (-2012)

4. Rabbi Jonathan Skolnick (2018-2019)

5. Plus the “Sauna Rabbi” from the Riverdale Jewish Center (~1986-2016)


In my opinion, SAR has become a safe haven for child sexual abusers as they have kept hiring the perverts. SAR is what they call an open school, and in their attempt to literally tear down the physical walls inside the school, they very likely have opened up the school to the child sexual abusers who use their openness physically, socially, and technically to enable and facilitate sexual abuse. Perhaps after all this, word is out on the street that SAR is the place for sexual abusers who go for easy access to students in an open school system with a history of lax enforcement. SAR has got to do a better job in its vetting process and in ongoing monitoring for inappropriate contact. 



SAR’S NARCISSISTIC “RESPONSE” HANDLING AND AVOIDANCE OF RESPONSIBILITY


SAR’s reaction has been heavily focused on the public relations to buttress themselves and in essence their very strategic messaging has been over and over that “they’ve done everything right,” including from a Rabbi working for them for ~20-years that said self-servingly just that the other day for the Jewish Link NJ. However, from my perspective, the truth of the matter is that they have done virtually everything wrong.


From what I’ve seen and read, it’s more like 90% of SAR’s response has been about their “response.” rather than on expressing any contrition or regret for what has happened under their watch, rather than on introspection for where they keep going wrong, rather than on working to fundamentally understand how they keep on hiring pervs and getting fooled for so long, and rather than genuinely strategizing on what they can do better to protect the children before it happens again. Is their policy and training working if the latest Skolnick incident happened just a few years after the prior incident in the high school and while they were still investigating the Rosenfeld/Schwartz one in the middle school? SAR’s response that they have done everything right in responding and of course, patting themselves on the back is like a mortician praising themselves for a great job cleaning up the dead bodies that they themselves facilitated.


Further, why is everyone talking about SAR’s response rather than prevention? And why is no one talking about the victims? For example, why is no one talking about the poor 14-old boy from SAR that was allegedly exploited by Skolnick or the other 20-25 victims? SAR is conveniently bringing in their own self-serving investigators and “experts” (supposedly one of these is alleged to have asked for leniency for the child abuser in a prior child sexual abuse case). It certainly seems like they are doing everything but holding themselves accountable for their mistakes of judgement and process.  Further, 1) why are they not cleaning house of any additional abusers that are still hiding in their ranks, and 2) starting with their leadership holding Rabbi Krauss accountable for the errors that were made with Skolnick’s hiring. 


Moreover, rather than SAR taking responsibility, I’ve heard plenty of blaming the child victims from gaslighting pundits who in my opinion should absolutely have their licenses revoked. These reprehensible, morally vacant “child victim advocates” aren’t holding the abusers accountable, but rather blaming the child victims with insane causative conclusions that it is because the children weren’t empowered, assertiveness or strong enough that’s why they were sexually abused. Truly, this is the age-old fraud of telling the rape victim that it’s her felt that she was brutally gang raped because she didn’t yell loud enough or fight back. Make no mistake, a little child is not ever going to be assertiveness or strong enough to fight off a perverted grown adult who has been patiently planning and grooming their victims. In fact, that’s why they call them children! It’s highly unfortunate that these people don’t see what it’s like until perhaps G-d forbid they are the victims themselves. I hope G-d open’s people eyes so that positive change can finally be made and children don’t have to suffer anymore from this.



WHAT DOES THE FUTURE HOLD


From their response, it is clear to many that for SAR this is about their image and reputation and not truly about Jewish education and a safe learning environment. Unfortunately, as long as SAR is more focused on protecting the institution of SAR and their jobs, rather than on protecting the kids in creating a safe learning and true Torah environment then nothing will really change for the better or safety of these children. 

Children’s Voices and Scars

Please see my new article in The Times of Israel called “Children’s Voices and Scars.”

Unfortunately, we are living in a time when many people are “destroyed” from various forms of abuse: physical, verbal, and emotional. This frequently occurs to those that are more vulnerable in society (e.g. exploited children). It is especially tragic that children–those that are still innocent and defenseless–are made to suffer at the hands of those that are bigger, stronger, and authority figures in their lives (teachers, clergy, etc.).

At the most basic level, we need to:

  • Listen (carefully), empathize, and be supportive.
  • Don’t be dismissive, make assumptions, or jump to conclusions.
  • Yes, everyone deserves a fair hearing and for the facts to be known.
  • No, we can’t as a community run from this uncomfortable issue any longer!

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Harassholes Y’all

Someone brought me a copy of this photo from their office. 


It says:

Stop Harassholes Y’all


Not bad. 


Harassment plus as*holes = Harassholes. 


Thank G-d, there are some very good people and managers out there.


But unfortunately not everyone is, and so there are also some real stinkin’ abusers too. 


These types of people should never be in power, since they misuse it!


They do not use the power they have been entrusted with to advance progress, and do good for the organization and its people, but rather they clumsily wield power for their own selfish, personal pleasures and vendettas–bullying and harassing others–and simply because they can.


Belittling others, making them feel stupid and worthless, and then going after them for whatever they want. 


Through intimidation, they keep others from talking…shhh! hush!


Emotional, verbal, and even physical abuse can be common. 


I remember one colleague telling me how their boss would literally throw things at them in their office while they had to sit there “taking it.”


Another has a boss that makes them do the stupidest, most trivial tasks–completely worthless stuff–just to prove a point…that they’re in charge. 


Marginalization, threats, bullying, abuse, harassment…it goes on and it shouldn’t!


In some cases, the harassholes are even protected from someone above.


Money, power, honor…more, more, more!


But G-d sees these people too and eventually cuts the bad ones down to size. 


My father used to say:

G-d does not let any tree grow into the heavens!


Eventually, I am pretty sure that harassholes end up getting some very BIG hemorrhoids or something from above that teaches them to use G-d’s gifts for the good, and to properly love, care, and empathize for other human beings–G-d’s children!


I never knew why hemorrhoids existed in this world, but there is a purpose to everything under the heavens. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Justice Is Absent

This artist rendering of “Law and Disorder in the Court” reminded me of what is going on now with the nomination hearings on Judge Brett Kavanaugh for the Supreme Court. 


This is not a vetting process, but political chicanery, as Dr. Christine Blaseley Ford comes forward with last-minute allegations of groping from a high school party almost 40-years ago. 


Being a #MeToo victim of a serial sexual predator in elementary school, I understand the severity of these acts and the injustice of the abusers going scot-free their whole lives. 


Yet the timing of this right before the Judiciary Panel vote, the single accuser, the 40-years that have passed without a peep, the lack of anyone corroborating the story, the holding of the accusation for almost 2-months all create at least an air of suspicion on this whole thing. 


I truly empathize with any victim of sexual abuse, and for that matter the victim of any violent abuse or assault, and I too seek justice for these victims.


However, this latest political theatre is once again undermining our system of democracy and the ability to get anything done. 


Trust in the system is broken because criminals go unpunished, and also because anyone can be accused of anything any time with barely a shred of evidence. “Innocent until proven guilty” has been chucked out the window. 


The breakdown of the system of cooperation, compromise, and commitment to progress irrespective of politics in the halls of Washington, D.C. is perhaps the biggest threat that we as a nation now face.


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal) 

Repeal The Statute of Limitations On Child Sex Abuse

We will never be a “civilized society ” or a true “country of laws” as long as we don’t repeal the statute of limitations on child sexual offenses.

Recently, South Africa and the state of Illinois repealed this outrageous law. 

Children can’t be held accountable for coming forward on things they don’t understand, are told didn’t actually happen, they feel too ashamed of and have repressed, or haven’t come to terms with. 

It is a travesty of justice that the animals who commit sexual crimes against children are given a get out of jail free card.

Not only that but by allowing these predators of children to escape justice, we are actually enabling and encouraging their violence against innocent children. 

A child cannot consent!

A child cannot fight off the grown-up!

A child is the absolute victim of the adults who traffick, abuse, molest, rape, and pimp them out. 

Often the children are unaware and from disadvantaged families or communities–they are sold or taken, used, abused, and often murdered and thrown in a ditch or some river. 

And why is there a statute of limitations on these crimes???

So I’ll tell you one reason is that the people who are in power are often the same sick abusers, pedophiles, and sexual deviants. 

They carry child porn on their computers, they sext compromising images of their genitals, they visit the dark web to lure children to their lairs, and they buddy up with other creeps to move and f*ck up these poor kids. 

Sex is one of those areas where people are able to make every excuse in the book for what they do–it’s an urge; it’s a fetish; it’s biological; it’s a preference; maybe they’re mad at their mommies or women in general–but never that they are sick f*cks who are abusing little children who cannot defend themselves!

Any politician that isn’t standing up and working to immediately repeal the statute of limitation on sexual abuse against children–please ask them uncompromisingly why!  

Remember, you were once a child, you likely have children, and if you are a moral and upright person you have a duty to protect the innocent children who cannot protect themselves. 

G-d is watching and hearing them–are you?  😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)  

The Evil That Is Child Trafficking

Please, please watch this short 4-minute video. 


It is very impactful!


EVEN…


– If you don’t know what’s going on with child sex abuse.


– If you are afraid to know.


– If you don’t want to believe it.


– If you busy and generally haven’t cared in the past. 


Here are some basic statistics:


💥There are at least 2 to 4 million cases of human trafficking annually!


💥It is estimated that 50% are children!


💥It’s a $32 billion dollar industry and growing! 


Maybe (hopefully) you believe in G-d


We are G-d’s children. 


Children are our children. 


We have a duty to protect children. 


How will you answer the call?


Here’s where you can place a call:


– National Child Abuse Hotline: (800) 4-A-CHILD (422-4453)


– National Sexual Assault Hotline: (800) 656-HOPE (4673)


Finally, may Almighty G-d do justice to all the pedophiles and abusers out there. 


May the Earth and Heavens swallow them up and spit them out. 


So that the children, the pure children, may grow up in a better world, a much better world. 😉