Cockroach Tea

So I went into this store in Chinatown in Washington, D.C. and was looking around. 


I saw this chest of draws with all sorts of herbs and insects listed. 


One draw included a label for “Cockroach”.


I asked innocently:

Do you have cockroaches in there?


The lady behind the counter responds in broken English:

Oh yes, there are roaches in there. 


Again, not understanding the relationship to the herbs for sale, I inquire:

What are the roaches used for?


The lady looks at me a little more intently and says:

It is for tea–cockroach tea!


My eyes literally bugged out and I go for a third round:

Do people drink that for health reasons?


She responds:

Yes, and it is good for managing pain. 


Hesitatingly, I asked her to take out the bag and open it so I could see for myself. 


I don’t know about you, but growing up in NYC, we definitely didn’t value cockroaches as part of our diet–in fact, we did everything we could to try and rid ourselves of these disgusting insects–but usually to no avail. 


The roaches survived everything we could throw at them!


If they are so resilient, maybe they can provide some health benefits to people (who knows–you’ve got to respect ancient alternative medicines), but I will only say this, you won’t get me anywhere near this roach tea–and not for all the tea in China!  😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Bad Little Mousey

So a colleague told me about an awful experience at work. 


They came into the office and had a big surprise. 


I won’t ask you to guess what it was. 


I’ll start off by giving you a hint.


It came from a mouse. 


Yep, they actually had what they called, “mouse poop” on their desk. 


Have to laugh even at the term…


But this is not what you want to have to deal with first thing in the morning, or anytime for that matter. 


What can you do though?


We share the world with other living creatures and if they want to poop on your desk–what are you really gonna do about it? 


I suggested setting some traps, but they said they want to see if it happens again. 


That’s two too many times for me.


Now though I learned to be grateful if my desk is poop-free. 😉


(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Bored Meetings

So it’s been raining so much here in the DC area lately.


The result is that the hot Summer July temperatures are down in the cool 70’s and the rain is flooding everywhere. 


When I got in the elevator this morning, someone goes to me:


“Did you see the leak in the hallway?  They are watering the tree with it.”


And sure enough, there it was!


When all this rain finally stops, there is going to be a lot of cleanup and repairs to do. 


The other thing was yesterday, we were on the way to a board meeting in our synagogue. 


In the elevator, are two other people–a man and women–carrying binders.


They say to us:


“Are you going to the board meeting?”


Surprised, because I didn’t recognize them from our synagogue, I respond affirmatively and ask to clarify:


“Oh, you’re going to the board meeting too?  I don’t recall seeing you there before.”


Then the elevator stops and they start to get off–but it’s to a different board meeting for the building.


When they see that we’re going to a different floor, they start laughing:


“I guess we’re going to different board meetings!”


I say:


“Yeah that’s right, different board meetings, but we’ll all probably be bored!


Another laugh by everyone, and we we’re all off to the races. 😉


(Source Photo:  Andy Blumenthal)

That’s One Scary Shot

Scary.jpeg

Wow, this is one scary photo. 


Imagine coming downstairs and seeing this kids body laying on the floor like that. 


Looks like he’s dead!


Would you freak out totally?


Call 911.


Get the emergency responders on the scene. 


Try to save his life. 


Thoughts race through your mind. 


Is he sick?  Was it an accident?  A crime scene?  Terrorism?  Is there an active shooter? 


Is he going to make it? 


Where is his family?


OMG, what if they lose him?


Well, it turns out this kids was just acting out and scaring his parents–and everyone else passing by.

Life is so full of surprises. 


You never know if it’s the real thing or not.


But you have to be prepared for anything, anytime. 


This is a crazy world we live in. 


Thank G-d when it’s just a false alarm and everything is okay. 


Unfortunately not every time is it all well that ends well. 😉


(Source Photo: Michelle Blumenthal)

From The Bronx To Jamaica

manischewitz
So as a kid, I remember the older folks joking that “wine is fine, but liquor is quicker!”



As we went for some wine for Shabbat in Fort Lauderdale by the beach, we had a whole bunch of surprises in one evening…



– First, I was more than a little surprised to find a bottle of Manischewitz Concord Grape wine–in of all places, CVS!



– On the way to CVS, we ran into the Jamaican Man, from our last vacation, who makes straw hats on the corner by the beach, and he sees me and somehow recognizes me–next thing I know he is practically embracing me as if I am one of his best friends, high-fiving and fist-bumping me–yeah, me the Jewish boy from the Bronx (this was a riot)!



– On the way back, there is a lady with her kids in tow on the street, and all of a sudden she turns to one of the younger kids and says in her accented English, “That’s almost a $100, you little SH*T!” We could barely believe our ears. 



What a lot of surprises all in one evening from the Bronx to Jamaica. 😉



(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Face Down

Face Down
Rounding the corner, it was interesting to see this guy lying face down in the pavement.



Heart attack, stroke, mugged, shot…lying in a pile of garbage-looking stuff.



Other people walking right past him holding their cups of coffee…not even paying attention to him.



Turned out he’s working, and there is an open manhole and he’s practically head first. 



Anyone down there?  😉



(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Got Flashed

Lady 2
Crazy day…true story.



I was going out to lunch in Washington D.C. today minding my own business…



When two young women were coming down the block in the opposite direction.



As they got closer, they started to giggle…



And then all of a sudden, at point blank range, one of them lifts up her skirt.



Both of them crack up and run off. 



I am not often left speechless, but this was definitely a new one on me. 



Let’s just say, my wife told me that I have some “splaining” to do this evening! 😉



(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)