The Dog Diet

Funny story from a wonderful relative of mine…made me laugh during this coronavirus outbreak.

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“I interrupt the COVID-19 pandemic to bring you this lil story…

Last night I went to Sam’s Club to buy a bag of food for my dogs.

Already in line, a woman behind me asked me if I had a dog.

I stare at her (those who know me will imagine my gaze 🤔😳) …but then why would I be buying dog food…right? 😝😝

So on impulse I told her no, that I didn’t have a dog, that I was starting the dog food diet again, and that I probably shouldn’t because I ended up in the hospital the last time, but 15 pounds less!

I told her that it was the perfect diet and that all you had to do is carry the kibbles in your pocket and eat one or two every time you feel hungry (I have to mention that practically everyone in line was interested in my story).

Frightened, the woman asks me if I ended up in the hospital because the dog food had poisoned me. I answered…of course not!

I was admitted because I bent down to smell the butt of a bulldog and I was hit by a truck 😂😂😂

I thought the man behind her was going to have a heart attack…he was laughing so hard!

…Let’s continue promoting reading! 😁

I have to confess…I posted this to make you smile. It’s your turn to copy/paste it and make someone else laugh.

We need to laugh more! Have a GREAT DAY😄😄😄”

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

 

Donuts With Syringe

So I never actually saw donuts being sold with the syringe. 

I get that they use the syringe to put the custard, jelly, and other fillings inside.

But leaving the syringe hanging out of the donuts like that conjures up images of addicts and junkies.

DESPITE that, these incredibly rich and overflowing donuts with gobs of toppings were some of the finest I’ve ever seen. 

Takes more than a good dose of willpower to resist and not become an addict of these carbohydrate powerhouses. 

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Salad and Falafel

Continuing the healthy eating trend.

This was delicious salad and falafel with tzatziki sauce and Italian dressing. 

It was so fresh and good.

Honestly, I wanted to eat more of this. 

Who needs all the junk foods. 

This looks good, tastes good, and is good for you!  😉

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Birds Dropping In For Lunch

These birds decided to swoop in for some lunch. 

It was funny to see the people go scrambling from the table.

The birds were completely unabashed and took their time over the chow. 

One couple in the corner had ordered this truly enormous meal (don’t worry, I was good and ate only the salad).

Each of them had a full lunch plate PLUS in the center of their table was “The Volcano” of nachos, cheese, chili, guacamole,  sour cream, and jalapenos. 

That was certainly no bird food with The Volcano punching in at 3,500 calories!

I have no idea how any two people could possibly eat that much food.

Probably good that the birds decided to drop in.  😉

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Tuna Salad – Eating Healthy

Intermittent fasting is going, thank G-d well. 

When I broke my fast today, I had a healthy salad with tuna fish. 

Dieting and eating healthy, and feeling good about it!

All the processed food is completely addictive and 100% poison!

Broke the addiction and I don’t plan to go back to the corrupt food industry fools that don’t care for atom about the people, but rather just the profits. 

Fruit, vegetables fish, nuts, seeds, and tea. 

The fleecing of America by all the processed food players–it’s disgusting.

I’m detoxing and I am grateful to G-d for helping me through this and showing me the way! 😉

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Cheesecake Heaven

So I never met a piece of cheesecake that I didn’t like. 

This was an awesome display of the varieties of it at the Cheesecake Factory.

I remember my mom used to make a pretty darn great cheesecake (and a lot of other good food)!

I still can see the graham cracker crust with the sweet hot creamy cheese filling coming out of the oven. 

Unfortunately one of the conundrum of life is that all the good tasting things are so darn fattening and bad for us. 

I think though if they can make fake burgers like Beyond that taste like the real thing, then surely at some point they will figure out how to make a skinny cheesecake that tastes good. 

There are still some mysteries left in this universe for us to unravel. 😉

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Cold-Press Fruits and Veggies

We starting watching this movie with Joe Cross called, “Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead.”

This guy weighs a ton and goes on a 60-day all juicing diet.  

He stops all the food and just carries his juicer with him everywhere making fresh fruit and vegetable cold-press. 

While obviously a little extreme, I like the idea of reducing the food intake (especially everything gluten which is death itself), and replacing it with healthy juice. 

I tried one of the super green juices and it literally tasted like eating grass. 

Uh, that’s not gonna realistically work for me. 

So I settled on Evolution’s Organic Super Fruit Greens that has a combination of orange, mango, pineapple, cucumber, spinach, romaine, and kale. 

I actually like it and am sitting here sipping on one as I write this blog post. 

I went into the fridge and threw all the carbs in the freakin garbage–good riddance!

Gotta get and stay healthy!  😉

(Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Duck Donuts Don’t

A colleague brought these unbelievable fresh, hot, Duck Donuts into the office yesterday. 

Each one weighs like a brick and is so full of carbohydrate good(bad)ness. 

I had to use all my self-control and willpower not to eat any (or all) of these. 

It comes down to mind over matter–If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter!  😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

Calories Extreme!

Someone mentioned that they went to the Cheesecake Factory the other day.

They said they bought a slice of cheesecake. 

I asked: “Was it the Oreo Cheesecake?”

They said, “yeah!”

But they went on, “It was too much for one person to eat.”

Uh, you think?  

Check out how many calories are in one piece of this “Oreo Dream Extreme Cheesecake” –>>1,630!

Yes, that’s one slice, not the whole cake!!!

And over 50% is from fat!

Take all this in context: The calories for an average female and male is just 1,900 and 2,500, respectively, if your moderately active. 

So one slice of cheesecake like this Oreo flavor is around 86% or 65% of the total recommended calorie intake for a women or man for the entire day!

What the heck do they put into this cheesecake–butter, cream cheese, sugar by the truckload!

I know it must be good, but does it also have to be this deadly! 😉

(Source Photo: Andy Blumenthal)

The Yom Kippur Diet Plan

So Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the Jewish calendar is a 25-hour day of repentance, prayer, and fasting. 

This last Yom Kippur, someone mentioned to me that some people take the idea of fasting and apply it to dieting during the year by doing a 3-day fasting. 

Uh, that sounds pretty severe and maybe even a little dangerous. 

But it got me thinking that on Yom Kippur we fast for a day and then eat a meal, so why not do that daily for dieting. 

Just subsist on one main meal a day–basically limiting intake of food to a few hours in the evening. 

This made sense to me as a moderate way that I could stay focused and disciplined without any food for about 20 hours at a time, but still give myself something to look forward to with a proper, natural dinner–almost like a natural give and take that I believe I could live with (at least for a good while). 

I thought let me give this a try!

And I did. 

First without drinking or eating. 

Then I rethought this after a few days and getting parched, and said just drink zero-calorie drinks, but no food or caloric intake during the day until the meal at the end of the day. 

And I’ve been doing this now since Yom Kippur 2 weeks ago. 

I have actually lost almost 10 pounds in that time and feel great. 

It hasn’t been hard–except for one day when the synagogue had a mega Bar Mitzvah kiddish/luncheon and I sat there and didn’t have a thing!

But otherwise, I go to work and all my activities, including working out–sometimes twice a day–and without any food.

It seems to be working. 

While previously, I stayed completely off any carbs, and still gained weight–now, I allow myself to eat everything (kosher) at dinner and am losing!

I wonder if I am on to something with this new “Yom Kippur Diet.”

I pray to Hashem that I’ve discovered something good and healthy here and am committed to seeing it through. 

(Source Graphic: Andy Blumenthal)