When it comes to strangers, itâs almost easier to put on a face, act all proper, and do whatâs right because they arenât our family, thus Avraham could run to help the strangers. Yet, when it comes to our own families, we donât feel it necessary to keep up pretenses. We sometimes say and do things to family that we would likely never say to or do in front of strangers, like Avraham telling Hagar and Ishmael to get out! We may even betray and hurt the ones we love, like when Avraham said Sarah was his sister putting her at jeopardy with Avimelekh. Further, we âsacrificeâ our children and spouses by putting our work (sometimes 24/7), social media, and our own brand and needs first, and donât adequately pay attention to whatâs really going on with our families, their needs, aspirations, and troubles; for example, Avraham was going to sacrifice Isaac, his and Sarahâs only child and âthe son of her old age.â We take for granted and even advantage of our families, because we can. And some at the further bad end of the spectrum, âgo home and kick the dog!â Yes, the pictures that everyone posts on Facebook and Instagram are what people want you to see and think about them (their personal brand): that everythingâs all rosy and they have the perfect lives and families, but I venture to guess that often, itâs far from the reality of what goes on âbehind closed doors.â
All of us need to pay attention and do whatâs right not only when we want to look good in front of others, but knowing that even in our own homes, G-d is watching what we do and how we treat each other.
If the husband and wifeâwith Hashemâs help as the third partnerâcreate a peaceful, loving, caring, and harmonious home then they can have the likes of Shabbat all week long.
I realized why we say the blessing for the food before we eat and bless G-d for the land after we eat: before we eat, we donât know how it will taste or whether it will sit well with us in our stomachs, but we imagine when we are hungry that all the good-looking food and drink will be great and so we bless G-d based on the perception of the coming food. However, after we eat, we make the blessing for the source of the food (the land, the food chain, and over wives for preparing it) for the sake of Shalom Bayit, because whether the meal was so good or not so good, we say thanks to Hashem and to our wives, because that contributes to Shabbat and peace in the home, always!
Thought this was a brilliant depiction of appreciating the invaluable people in our lives.
You don’t know what you have until you don’t have it anymore.
Often, people become lazy in their relationships or they stop appreciating what/who they have–we end up taking them for granted, not paying them our loving attention or worse mistreating them.
But one day, those people won’t necessarily be there for us anymore.
That’s when our eyes are opened to what we’ve done, but then it’s too late to go back and undo the mistakes we made.
One good friend told me that marriage is not like Hollywood; it’s not all loving all the time:
“There are good days and bad, but it’s better to have 5 even really bad days a month with your partner than 30 bad days a month by yourself, alone.”
Don’t wait until it’s too late to love and care for your spouse, children, grandchildren, etc.
Eventually, the clock runs out and regret won’t bring anyone back.
Great artistic depiction of the beauty of women. Simple yet elegant. Mysterious yet familiar. Intense yet tender and caring. Thoughtful yet expressive. Dark yet full of light. Natural yet sensual. Fantasy yet reality. A best friend, a partner, a lover. Together a home. đ (Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
Please see my new article in The Times of Israel called, “The Power of Love.”
When we act up and fight with each other, then in the end, we will really only end up hurting ourselves.
Tomorrow can be better than today and yesterday, if we learn to live in peace and brotherhood with each other, and understand that hurting another is really only hurting ourselves in the end. G-dâs holiness dwells among us only when we stop the silly bickering and infighting, and love each other, and Him, with all our heart and soul. (Credit Photo: Andy Blumenthal)
I’m sitting resting on Shabbat, minding my own business, and reading the Favorite Tales of Sholom Aleichem, but then my wife tells me a story circulating in the news that seemed like it could even be one better. At least my exaggerated version of it did as a tall tale in the making.
It starts like this: There is a woman who did not have a lot of luck with men…
It was a fun time at The Amish Experience today in Lancaster Country, Pennsylvania.
One and a half hour bus tour of Amish country.
45 Minute movie about Jacob, an Amish teen, trying to decide whether he wants to be in the outside world or in the Amish one.
And another hour of so tour of an Amish school house and home.
Felt like I learned a lot about their culture (including no TV, internet, electricity [just batteries and solar], and education only through 8th grade).
Honestly, it doesn’t seem like they really have much a choice in whether to choose the church and become Amish or leave, because if they choose to leave they are shunned (i.e. excommunicated)!
So you either choose you family, church, community, and a wife (and there is no divorce) or you run off to G-d knows where completely alone and “divorced” from everything you know.
The video is when we stopped at an Amish farm and I went in to the big barn with all the cows.
After so much time on the bus, I needed to ham it up a little and have fun with:
“How now brown cow. It is so nice to eat you! You are beautiful animals. And thank you Hashem for making you!” đ